Baby, You’re a Firework (or at Least Your New Employee Is)

Fourth of July is just around the corner and just like fireworks, onboarding employees can be exciting, stressful, and downright treacherous at times. In the spirit of the patriotic festivities, let’s look through the top ten most popular fireworks in comparison to common candidates and employees that could be experienced in the onboarding process. The process of Onboarding a new employee can be time-consuming, but with ExactHire’s resources and Onboarding Software, you could spend more time getting to know your employee!

If you’re interested in finding out what type of employee you are, take this light-hearted quiz, and then check out the descriptions of each firework below!

1. Party Poppersfirework-party-popper

Party poppers are generally listed as a novelty item or trick noise maker and are sold year-round in shops which sell party supplies. It emits a loud popping noise by means of a small friction-actuated explosive charge that is emitted by pulling a string. Finding a candidate similar to a party popper may come in many forms; one may be the applicant that initially seems exciting and opinionated but can also fizzle out fairly quickly, or it could be the employee that brings excitement all year-round.

2. TNT Poppers


These are a hit with younger kids, mainly because they can’t set themselves on fire but can still annoy the ever-living daylights out of adults by throwing them at their feet. TNT Poppers are inexpensive and can keep people entertained for a total of maybe 20 minutes. In terms of potential employees, this is probably the applicant that may seem like a good fit initially, but after further investigation or an interview, he or she would probably only last a few months in the company.

3. Snakes


At first glance, snakes may seem like mere child’s play, but if you really think about it, how does a small tube of practically nothing turn into an endless black “snake”? We may never know, but this is the new employee that you may not have had high hopes for but it turns out that he can do literally anything – all day. This candidate can make something out of nothing, and can truly be one of the best assets to your company. (Or maybe you’d rather just consider them the metaphorical snake, we’re not here to judge.)

4. Sparklers


An age-old favorite, sparklers light up the front yard for a few minutes and as any new employee does, lights up the eyes of those around it (or him). Though sparklers only last for a few moments, a new employee or candidate may qualify as a Sparkler if he or she comes into the business with flare and favoritism, and sticks around as a consistent favorite.

5. Firecrackers


Iconic? Sure. Noisy? Definitely. It’s easy to imagine what a potential employee with the personality (or voice) of a firecracker would be – loud and potentially explosive. As a candidate, this person or “firecracker” could be full of ideas and popping with enthusiasm! Definitely someone worth holding on to.

6. Bottle Rockets


Just as its name suggests, a Bottle Rocket is a small rocket lodged in a bottle with a stabilizing stick attached to it. A big oversight when thinking about Bottle Rockets (in terms of people) is that they come in a ton of different sizes and models; sure they stick to the basic model, but also bring different ideas (big or small), projects, and goals to the workplace.

7. Roman Candles


As the site, Thrillist, describes Roman Candles “Lovely but dangerous” and they couldn’t be more accurate – for the actual firework. In terms of Roman Candle-esque people though – it’s more in terms of lovely and dangerous. Roman Candle employees come in everyday ready to conquer the workplace and any task that may come their way.

8. Smoke Balls


Smoke Balls are little bombs that when lit give off a few minutes of colored smoke and usually stain anything they touch (I love them). As far as excitement goes, they probably wouldn’t make anyone’s top ten, but they are fun and reliable – never changing what they do. To find someone in the workplace comparable to a smoke ball, you’d probably consider them to be trustworthy, dependable, and mostly predicable.

9. Fountains


A family favorite, Fountains are the fireworks that everyone gets because it’s probably illegal to buy artillery shells in your town. Either way, Fountains are fun and last a long time with many different effects throughout their show. As a potential employee, the fountain may be underestimated at first but with time will prove that she has a ton of new ideas, one just as different as the one before it. Fountain employees are stellar assets to a company and should be held onto at all costs.

10. Artillery Shells


Artillery Shells are the massive fireworks that Fourth of July is truly known for – and also illegal in many states – but that’s not important. What’s important is how big and beautiful they are, each different and special in their own way. As these should be left to be set on fire by the professionals, it is likely that the Artillery Shells in the office are probably the CEO’s or someone who set the whole business in motion. If not, watch out because the shell in your office is heading for big things.


No matter what kind of employee you or anyone in the office is, everyone should be celebrated this Fourth of July, just like our nation’s Independence.

Have a great holiday from everyone at ExactHire!

Image credit: FREE CLIP: Sparklers by Cinema White (contact)

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